


He Wears Oxfords (I Wear Sneakers)

by TheConsultingStepladder



Category: Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015)
Genre: Crack, Eggsy & Roxy Bromance, Harry Hart Lives, M/M, Mentions of Taylor Swift, Roxy is a Little Shit, eggsy loves taylor swift
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-28
Updated: 2015-08-05
Packaged: 2018-03-26 05:45:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3839284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheConsultingStepladder/pseuds/TheConsultingStepladder
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eggsy has very few secrets and now Roxy knows at least two.</p>
<p>1 - His taste in music and 2- His taste in men.</p>
<p>She plans to combine the two to bring him his overdue happy ending.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Track 1: Love Story

“Could you please stop that, it’s driving me insane!” 

Roxy was pushing the hair out of her face, elbows on the table and glaring at him with as much irritation as she could muster. The bags under her eyes were heavy but Eggsy had no doubt that she could still kick his arse in her sleep if she had to.

He stilled his hand where he had been drumming his pencil on the desk and shot her an apologetic smile.

Examinations were by far the most boring part of Kingsman training and Eggsy had trouble keeping still when he knew he could be out there in the field.

Studying all night seemed like a good idea at the time, though he had passed out way before midnight while Roxy continued to go over her notes, resting them on Eggsy’s head in her lap.

He laid down the pencil, instead swiping his thumb across his mp3 player and plugging his earbuds in. Even thought Merlin had suggested (numerous times) that music was distracting from studies, Eggsy insisted he only ever found it motivating.  
Bobbing his head softly to the rhythm, he chewed over one of the trickier questions on the paper.

Half an hour later he glanced over to his desk mate only to see a sly grin on her face.

She hadn’t finished already, right?  
No way.

But as he glanced down he saw her page was still half blank. Confused he pulled out one of the earbuds to question her, accidentally yanking out both. The second he did he knew what that grin was about.

Despite being bereft of both phones, the music was trilling loud and clear through the hall, empty except for the two of them.  
Eggsy could only thank god that Merlin had let them take the examination on their own.

His face flushing red, he immediately clicked the player off, cursing himself for always having his volume set so loud. Roxy stifled a giggle and avoided his gaze.  
“Yeh go on, laugh it up. You got a problem with my tunes?”

Roxy didn’t fall for his false bravado and instead chuckled loudly, turning to face him.  
“Didn’t think you listened to that sort of thing.”

“I got a varied taste Rox, ain’t nothing to be ashamed of.” he spoke cockily but his expression was betraying him.

There was five minutes of silence before he heard her muttered reply,

“But, Taylor Swift though?”

“Shut up Rox!” he whined, refusing to look at her as she giggled again.

They sat in silence for the remainder of the examination, Roxy never losing that slight quirk to her mouth and Eggsy still berating himself for even bringing the damn thing here.  
As the clock ticked over there was a knock on the door and Merlin entered, clipboard in hand.  
“Times up lady and gent, hand them over.”

Roxy, still looking exhausted but with a little more spring in her step led them both to the front where they silently handed their papers to him.

“That will be all for now, you’re free for the rest of the afternoon but I wouldn’t plan on going anywhere tonight.”

“C'mon Merlin, we’ve been studying for weeks, you can’t tell me you know something’s gonna come up tonight.”

“You’re right Eggsy, I can’t. But I do know that Harry wants to see the both of you in his office for a debriefing for next week’s mission.”

“Aaaw you’re having a laugh, mate…..”

“I am not.”

Eggsy swore he could feel Merlin’s smirk as they left the room, “Class dismissed.”

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

They sat in the tea room of the Kingsman headquarters, Roxy softly dozing on one couch, Eggsy with his feet up, instant messaging his Mum and letting her know he’d be back for tea tomorrow. Again. Sorry.  
It was quiet and warm by the fireplace and he was just about to join in on the snooze session when the door creaked open and a familiar voice spoke.

“Glad to see you two are comfortable.”

“A'right Harry?” he cracked a smile behind him.

“Is Miss Morton asleep or just resting her eyes.”

The curled figure on the opposite couch mumbled in reply.

“Excellent, Merlin may have mentioned I wanted a meeting with you both tonight. If you could come to my office in an hour we can get started.”

Both the younger members groaned.  
Harry sighed and cleaned his glasses on his pocket hankerchief. 

“May I ask what’s so tedious about important mission debriefings?” 

Eggsy rocked his head back onto the headrest so he was actually looking at his mentor. “Nuffin at all, it’s not like it’s the most boring part of the mission.”

“And the most vital, excluding keeping yourselves alive.”

“Yeah yeah it’s fine we’ll be there a'right. Don’t you worry love.” he winked cheekily.

The older man huffed through his nose, and gave Eggsy a withering look before turning to leave. 

With Harry's eyes averted, Eggsy took a second to appraise just how much healthier Harry looked the last few months. 

The scar around his eye was white and crooked, puckering his eyebrow and pulling the skin away from his cheek a little. It still made his stomach flip to look at it.  
Harry still had most of his vision in that eye but if you looked closely enough (and he had, mostly by secretly taking photos with his phone), the colour of his iris was slighter paler than the other and the pupil took longer to focus.  
Aside from that he filled out his suit a lot nicer now, had been allowed out on a few more field missions lately and just looked…well… a hell of a lot more like the Harry he remembered before the world went to hell.

He hadn't realised he was staring until the moment both men were surprised by the sound of music, chiming from somewhere in the room.

The soft beat was hard to hear at first until the vocals began.

_“Romeo take me somewhere we can be alone, I’ll be waiting all that’s left to do is run, you’ll be the prince and I’ll be the princess….”_

“ROX!”

Eggsy was on the other couch pulling Roxy’s phone out of her hand before she could stop him. She was cackling loudly, tears starting in the corners of her eyes when she saw her friend’s flushed face.

Harry stood by the door with a blank expression, completely baffled at the scene before him before quietly exiting the room.

Eggsy shoved Roxy’s now silent phone down his shirt before crossing his arms and sulking back on the couch. The young woman was hysterical by this time, her arms across her stomach, cheeks crimson and every time she caught a glance of Eggsy’s face she laughed more.

In between gasps she spoke, “ I don’t see…. the problem…. it seemed like... the right time….”

He couldn’t help but smile a little, seeing how happy winding him up made her.

“Dunno whatcha talking about.”

“Ooooh come on,” Roxy knelt on the couch, her breath easing, “I bet you wouldn’t mind giving him a _literal_ de-briefing.”

She was met with a cushion lobbed at her head which made her laugh even harder as she listened to Eggsy stride out of the room and shut the door behind him.


	2. Track 2: You Belong With Me

Roxy was addicted.  
Ever since she'd made Eggsy blush like a schoolboy that night she couldn't help but find any opportunity to do it again.

Truthfully she would feel bad if it was purely for the look on his face, but she thought perhaps if she prodded enough, he'd finally explode and come clean to Harry about how he felt.

Eggsy had spun the whole truth on her when he stayed round her home one night for movies and takeaway.  
They drank until he was completely off his face and whining to her about how he felt about a certain gentleman spy who was _'old enough to be my dad, but I can't even pretend that matters to me have you seen him Rox, oh my god I don't know what I'm doing, don't ever tell him please.”_ and quite frankly Roxy was now sick to the back teeth of watching those two dance around each other.

If snapping Eggsy was what it took she would do it and have fun in the process.

The next time she tried, Eggsy had just returned from a mission. He had a bust lip, a slashed cheek and a black eye but nothing else to show.

He was sitting in the office chair while Harry was fussing around, complaining about how such a simple case shouldn't have resulted in any injuries and that Eggsy was far too reckless for his own good.  
The young man rolled his eyes at his mentor's chiding and threw little winks to Roxy trying to crack her up.

She smirked and strode over to sit on the desk beside him.  
“That's a nasty split” she pointed to his lip.

“Naaah, it's fine. Besides Harry's taking good care of me, giving me the shafting of a lifetime over a soddING BLACK EYE?!”

She saw the tension in the older agent's shoulders at that, and he was about to bite back when she spoke up, 

“I should get a cloth for his face Galahad, yeah? Clean him up a bit before he goes home?”  


Harry stopped for a second, thrown off by Roxy's intervention. “Yes, thank you Lancelot that would be much appreciated.”

The atmosphere seemed a little calmer when she returned with a damp cloth and began wiping away the dried blood from Eggsy's cheek.  
He hissed when she grazed his lip and she mouthed 'Sorry' with a small smile. It was then she glanced sideways to see Harry fiddling about with papers and files and she saw her opportunity. Dropping the cloth onto Eggsy's chest she pulled back and grimaced.

“Ooooh I'm sorry, I can't. That cut is making me all queasy.”

Eggsy looked up at her in stunned silence, “ Rox, you've seen ten times more blood than this before breakfast, what are you...”

She interrupted him with an exclamation, "NO I can't, maybe I'm not feeling well, or maybe it's because it's you. Sorry Eggsy... I can't...”  
Turning to Harry she pushed the cloth into his hand,  


“You can take over from me can't you?”

Before he had a chance to respond she smiled that winning smile,  
“Thank you Harry! I mean, Galahad. I'll go cool off, be back soon.”

She turned the corner quickly but immediately slid down, hiding behind the open door.

After a moment Harry mumbled something under his breath and Eggsy protested, “No it's fine honest I'll do it myself.” but he was suddenly cut off and there was complete silence.

Roxy held her breath for a while and after a minute, carefully chose her moment to peer around the door.  
Eggsy was leaning back in Harry's office chair, his glasses pushed on top of his head, while the other man sat on the edge of the desk, shirt sleeves rolled up the elbows, softly dabbing the bloody lip.  
Eggsy's face was red around his cheeks and ears and she could see he was desperately trying not to make eye contact. The man above him, moved in precise, gentle motions across his face, the finger of his other hand curled under the younger agent's neck, coaxing him to turn his head this way and that with just a small touch.

Whilst Eggsy was deathly silent, Harry was making small talk, still reprimanding him occasionally but in softer tones, asking about his family and noting the weather, all while staring at his injury in a way that was so very controlled it couldn't be natural.  
She grinned ear to ear at her own machinations. There was just one thing left to do.

Swiping her fingers across the phone she brought up a video, scrolled the bar across until it was at the right spot , waited until she saw Eggsy finally cave in, glance up to catch Harry's eyes and pressed play.

_“If you could see that I'm the one who understands you, been here all along so why can't you see, you belong with me.”_

She watched the realisation dawn on her friend's face, creating a crimson flush across his cheeks before he ducked under Harry's hands and darted towards the doorway.

“ROXYYYYYYYY!”

Legging it across the mansion, she laughed all the way back to her room.


	3. Track 3 & 4: Story of Us/Style

Eggsy had to admit to himself, even though it was incredibly embarrassing and inappropriate at times, Roxy was pretty determined and must have been constantly plotting and researching ways to set a scene up between himself and Harry.

It was obvious when she was just taking the opportunities when she could, the incident in the office being a perfect example. 

However, when Eggsy actively started avoiding Harry in order to avert any further embarrassment, he'd suddenly find himself and the older agent in seemingly random, but very obviously meditated situations.

Case in point; the time he and Harry were called into an 'urgent' meeting and no one else showed up.

Fifteen minutes later, he was staring directly at the table in front of him tapping his pen whilst Harry was fiddling with his glasses trying to get a message to Merlin (also strangely absent), about this so called meeting.  
It was hard enough to make topical conversation with a man you were secretly head over heels for, even worse a man who knew pretty much everything about you and your life, whilst you knew little to nothing about his.

Eggsy settled on glancing over at Harry when he was sure the older man wasn't looking until finally, Harry decided he'd waited long enough, apologised for the disruption to Eggsy a little too politely and left the room.

He swore under his breath at himself for acting so awkwardly.

The silence was broken by a familiar voice floating through the room from what sounded like an internal speaker.

_“Now I'm standing alone in a crowded room and we're not speaking, and I'm dying to know is it killing you like it's killing me...”_

Eggsy pressed his palms against his eyes and groaned. He knew somewhere Roxy was laughing.

\---------------------

A week later, and there was a planned assassination attempt on a royal dignitary.

Harry, Roxy, Percival, himself and a few other agents he wasn't acquainted with were assigned to attend the gala at which the attempt was to be made. 

Roxy's little game was the last thing on Eggsy's mind as he stood in an enormous ballroom, head to toe in the most expensive threads he'd ever worn, sipping a martini and checking the profiles of everyone in attendance on his glasses internal display. His heart was racing with adrenaline and he was itching to make a move.

Unfortunately, before the speeches and 'thank you's could even begin, Percival had identified, secured and disarmed the criminal whilst another agent had given him a fair pummelling for his trouble.  
The assassin had acted alone it seemed, separate from the organisation they believed to be behind the plot, hence the lack of any other threatening figures. Merlin tutted at the shoddiness of it all and demanded he be brought back to HQ for questioning.

Eggsy was gutted, he had seen the briefest struggle from the back of the room and nothing more; total waste of time.  
Or it would've been if it didn't mean he got to see Harry looking the damn finest he ever had, tailored to within an inch of his life and questioning whether or not bow-ties could even be considered sexy?

It was as he was admiring his mentor from the other side of the room that Roxy sidled up behind him.  
“Looks pretty dashing right?”

He coughed, sipping his drink and turned around, using his most polite accent.  
“If you're into that sort of thing I suppose.”

“Which you very much are.”

He shrugged in response.

“You know you're a coward don't you.”

Another shrug.

Roxy stepped in front of him so his eyes met hers. 

“Eggsy...”

He swallowed down the rest of this drink and grimaced.  
“Mission was a total waste of a bloody evening, weren't it. At least we got some nice gear out of it right?”

She held back a sigh and nodded in agreement, turning to stand beside him and watch as Harry approached them both.

“Thank you both for your time, apologies for overestimating how much man power we would require. If you like you can both take the shuttle home tonight, we won't need you until Friday.”

“Cheers Galahad, Mum'll be happy to see me come home without any bruises for once.”

Roxy chimed in,“My parents expect me to come back a little bruised considering what I do. They'll be asking me what went wrong.” 

Harry smiled fondly at the both of them, “ I'm sure they're proud of the both of you. Incidentally you can keep those suits. You might need them for the Christmas Party I daresay.”

“I bet yours just came out your closet though, didn't it?” Eggsy smirked as he gestured to Harry's finely cut lapels.

The taller man seemed taken aback and Roxy swore if the man was capable of it he would've blushed.  
With a smirk she stepped back out of Eggsy's view and tapped something small behind her back.  
Eggsy has just reached out to feel the material on Harry's collar.

_“You got that James Dean daydream look in your eye and I got that red lip classic thing that you like...”_

Eggsy was unsure he heard it at first over the sound of the classical music playing in the hall but as the words clicked into place, he smiled softly.

_“And when we go crashing down, we come back every time, cos we never go out of style...”_

He turned to look at Roxy who was already walking away looking very proud of herself.  
He mouthed an obscenity at her and she simply smiled back. 

Grinning from ear to ear he turned back around and was met with... nothing.  
Harry was already leaving. 

He swallowed over the tightness in his throat. Looking down at his empty martini glass, he placed it gingerly on the edge of a table and made his way quickly out of the opposite door.


	4. Track 5: Mean

The cold night air made his breath visible and he watched it curl away towards the street lamps while he calmed himself.

Roxy's teasing was one thing but when it seemed like Harry was getting fed up of their little in joke, when it really held a lot more weight than Eggsy wanted to admit... well he didn't want to ruin what they had.

Turning back, he walked the perimeter of the building until he found Harry, waiting for his personal cab to arrive at the main entrance.

“Can I get a lift?”

The older man blinked out of his reverie, he'd obviously been deep in thought. Eggsy gave him a moment to reply.

“I thought you'd want to catch the shuttle with Roxanne?”

“Nah, Mum and Dais' will be fast on and don't wanna disturb them. We could rent a film, have a drink if you're up for it?”

“I'm actually rather tired, I think you'd better catch up with Lancelot and accompany her home.”

Eggsy frowned and started towards his mentor.  
“Look, it's just a joke me and Rox have, the whole Taylor Swift thing. She heard me listening to it once and thought it was funny so I let her have it. She doesn't mean nothing by it.”

“And what am I supposed to have construed her to mean by it, it seems perfectly innocent to me?”

“Oh, er... nothing. Just cos you left so quickly, I figured you was annoyed or something.”

It seemed to be the end of the conversation, until the older man stepped forward, keeping his eyes on his protégé and said,  
“However, considering she only ever plays her little pranks when _I'm_ in your presence and I am aware that most of Miss Swift's work is love songs, _believe me not to be that old_ , perhaps there is something in it you'd like to tell me?”

The young man chewed on his lip and his eyes flickered away from Harry’s for a moment.  
He improvised.  
“She said we made a cute couple.” he smirked, “We was laughing about it so she keeps winding me up. If it bothers you any she'd stop right away honest. It's only a joke.”

The silence that followed was the most uncomfortable he'd ever had with Harry, far more than the one following his standing in Eggsy's living room in London when he should well have been dead in Kentucky.

Harry's face betrayed nothing, but the lack of a reply and the tightness in his expression, even the way his hands were folded, told Eggsy everything.

“Harry?”

The cab pulled up in front of him and without hesitation he climbed inside.

“I'll see you tomorrow Eggsy, wish Miss Morton a good night from me.” and without turning to look behind him, he shut the door.

As the cab pulled away, Eggsy stood frozen on the pavement. Harry was upset. He was upset when Eggsy said it had all been a joke. And as much as his mind was doing it's best to protect from coming to a rash conclusion, his heart was singing that it could only mean one thing.

“Shit.”

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Hello?”

“Rox, you've gotta help."

“What are you talking about?!

"You've been really good at embarrassing me lately but now you gotta help because this is kinda your fault.”

"Slow down Eggsy.”

“I think Harry might be in love with me.”

“....”

“Rox?”

“My god, you really are stupid.”

He sighed deeply down the phone,  
"Why you gotta be so mean?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tenuous link to the song I know but I couldn't work an actual song in here yet. And I know I keep changing the number of chapters but I PROMISE THIS WILL BE FIVE CHAPTERS NOW OK I PROMISE I AM ACTUALLY FINISHING IT AS WE SPEAK. Thank you for staying tuned, sorry it's taken so long!


	5. Track 6: How You Get The Girl

“What the hell are we doing here?” Roxy whispered into Eggsy's ear when she realised they were pulling up to Harry's home.

Luckily for him Roxy was caught up talking to another female agent when he called her at the gala.  
When she heard how frantic he was she made her excuses and they caught the nearest taxi.

She remained silent the rest of the trip in respect for her friend's already frazzled nerves, until she saw the white brick terraced house looming in the distance.

“I'm pretty sure Galahad's not going to fly the country because you rejected him.”  
“But I didn't know I was rejecting him! I thought I was... fuck I don't know what I thought alright.”

He threw money at the driver and hopped out of the car, immediately striding to the front door and knocked.

No answer.

Another three attempts fared no better.

“C'mon Harry, I know you're there I can smell your rank scotch from here!” he yelled through the letterbox.

“ Are you sure he's in?” Roxy half whispered with more respect for Harry's neighbours than Eggsy.  
“I saw him twitching his curtains as we were coming into the street.”

The young man pouted and tensed his hands, knocking again more forcefully and shouting, “Harry I'll wake your whole damn street up if you don't come out!”

Finally he turned away from the door and the sad glean of his eyes caught Roxy off guard, she felt for the first time, like she knew just how deep his affection ran 

“He's ignoring me.”

She put a hand on his shoulder and he turned into her.  
He didn't cry but breathed hard into her arms and she felt a slight quake in his shoulders.  
Roxy began to feel quite furious with Mr Hart and his childish attitude towards someone who obviously meant so much to him and she was about to have her own letterbox shouting session when Eggsy mumbled.

“Why can't it all be like the songs Rox, why can't this just be like a stupid eighties movie and be over with already.”  
“What movies?”  
“I dunno, Harry loves them. He shows me 'em all the time even when they're shite.”

Roxy smiled. She had an idea.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“What are we doing?”

“Relax, this'll bring him round for sure.”

“Bring him round? I don't even know if he wants me here?”

She sighed and continued to search on her phone.

“ **HE** thinks you're not interested and you're here to apologise for leading him on, **YOU** think he might like you back but also that he might just be mad at you for laughing at him. You are both idiots and I'm going to make you realise it in the most humiliating way ever.”

“Oh thanks for being such a good shitting friend,” he grimaced at her.

She ignored him and kept tapping on his phone until she finally found what she wanted.

“Ok this is perfect, hold this and when I say go - hold it up and press play.”

“Are you sure this is going to work?”

“Are you sure Harry loves eighties films?” she turned to ask him as she picked up a small pebble from the ground.

Eggsy smiled gently and looked down at the phone, “He's such a sap, I'm pretty sure he plays it down when we watch 'em together, but you can tell.”

The woman grinned wickedly to herself and spoke softly, “Well then let's just hope he's a fan of John Cusack.”  
Before Eggsy could respond, she flicked the stone at the upstairs window and it made a satisfyingly loud clink, which seemed to do the trick, as the light soon flickered on from the room.

“Now Eggsy!”

He flicked the play button on the screen, not stopping to check what it was and held the phone up.

Then it clicked.“Wait.... John Cusack? You mean that shitty film where he's standing outside her room all creepy with that boombox? Oh my god Rox, I'm not doing..”

Before he could retreat, a few things happened at the same time.

Harry's curtains flew open to reveal the man himself, in his robe and sans glasses opening the window to see what the noise was, and the video Eggsy had started began to play out loudly down the street.

  


_“I want you for worse or for better, I would wait for ever and ever, broke your heart I'll put it back together I will wait forever and ever.”_

  


“Oh my goooooooooooooooood” Eggsy moaned under his breath, turning so vibrantly red that Roxy had to turn away to stop the giggles from overtaking her.

This was it, this was the end of all things, he decided. 

Eggsy was mortified and Harry was gonna shout out his window at them and they'd leave and pretend this never happened, except it did and he's never ever gonna forget it.

However, when he actually dared to glance upwards he was met not with an angry glare, but a confused smile. He felt his heartbeat increase, his cheeks flushing for a very different reason and risked a small smile back at the man, making sure to hold the phone a little higher.

“Oi, Lancelot,” he muttered from the side of his mouth, “I think it's working.”

Still red faced from containing her laughter, she glanced up and properly ascertained the scene that was taking place.

The two men were holding each others gazes steadily, neither making a move or even a gesture to indicate what was to happen next but both regarded each other with warm and open expressions  
Now her heart was hammering. Was this really going to be it?

Suddenly, the older man pulled the curtains to and the light flickered off soon after.

Eggsy dropped the arm holding the phone; defeated. “I thought....”

“Shut up... look!” Roxy had risen to his side and pointed to the light now streaming through the window on the stairs. It was soon followed by the one in the living room.

“He's coming Eggsy, don't screw this up!”  
“Wait, where are you going?”

Roxy had her back turned to him and was heading down the street,  
“If you two start kissing I don't want to be here do I?”

She smiled warmly and waved behind her as she walked away.


	6. Track 7: Enchanted

Eggsy grinned and turned around just in time to see Harry opening the front door, now dressed in cardigan, pyjama pants and slippers. Still sans glasses which was welcome relief, at least he knew Merlin wasn't watching.

The slight smile the older man wore told him he was safe for now.  
“Say Anything?”

“What?”

Harry chuckled, “The film? You were recreating the scene?”

“Oh yeah, well... I din't really like it, too cheesy for me but I thought you'd enjoy it.”

Harry blinked down at Eggsy's hand. “Bit different to a boombox I'll admit, also was originally Peter Gabriel playing I believe.”

The young man sighed, fiddling with the phone, “Yeah it were Roxy's idea. But I did wanna see you.”

They locked eyes for a small, but perceptively tense moment until he spoke again.

“I'm gonna come clean to you now alright, so don't freak out.”  
He held out his hand in a calming gesture and spoke slowly.

“I really like you Harry. In a seriously bad way considering I work with ya and all that. I dunno when it started so don't ask me, but I know it's there an'... I know it ain't just a crush. I mean, don't get me wrong. I fancy you but it's way more than that.”

Harry looked down on the ground in front of them and breathed out slowly.  
He made no noise following, so Eggsy continued.

“So this is gonna go one of two ways yeah? Either you're just mad at me cos I made fun about us and you're gonna lecture me and then we can forget this ever happened. Or you're gonna tell me you like me too and we're gonna try and be....something.”

The agent refused to meet his younger friend's eyes and remained silent.  
Eggsy let him have his time to think but after a minute or so, he started to get fidgety.

Another minute passed and he was gritting his teeth.  
“You have to say something y'know, I ain't waiting for the bus here Har' I wanna know if I had good reason to be totally fucked over with you.”

The reply was a grunt, followed by the man at the door finally meeting his eyes and speaking sternly.  
“Eggsy, I appreciate the compliment and since you're being honest I will too.”

A cool sweat covered his neck in that moment's pause and his knees trembled almost imperceptibly.

Then Harry grinned.

  
“I am...totally fucked for you too. Actually.” 

  
Eggsy couldn't stop the smile that spread across his face. He breathed out heavily, and leant his forward, his hands on his calves. “Thank god.”

Aware of the figure moving towards him he stood up. Harry was nearly chest to chest with him, and the world seemed to stop around them.

“Eggsy....”

The slight curve to his friend's mouth and the strong hand on his shoulder was all the incentive he needed.

Leaning up on the balls of his feet he pressed his lips to Harry's. The older man's hands slid round his waist, propping him forward into his arms until he could feel his lover's heart pounding just as strongly as his own.

Grasping the collar of his cardigan he leant deeper into the kiss, gaining a huff of breath and a mumbled noise of affection from Harry that made him dizzy.  
He moved a hand up into his hair and felt it soft and curly at the nape of his neck, as the hand on his back rubbed gently along his spine.

It was warm, wet and slow and Eggsy thought his heart would pop out of his chest right there.

Until he heard it echoing from the narrow alleyway a few houses down the street.

  
_“There I was again tonight, forcing laughter, faking smiles. Same old tired lonely place. Walls of insincerity, shifting eyes and vacancy, vanished when I saw your face.”_

  
Glancing back, he couldn't see her, but he knew Roxy was sitting with her phone in the alley somewhere. However, maybe she wasn't laughing so much this time.

_“Your eyes whispered, 'Have we met?' across the room your silhouette, starts to make its way to me.”_

Harry blinked, confused for a second as he pulled away, but Eggsy just carried on grinning. He couldn't even be mad at her right now. 

For the first time it really was perfect.

Trailing his fingers down the older agent's arm, he came to rest on his hand and held it gently, pulling him further out into the street.  
“I ain't Fred Astaire but I promise I won't stand on your feet.”

_“And it was enchanting to meet you, all I can say is I was enchanted to meet you...“_

Standing in the middle of the pavement with his hand gently pulling him along, Eggsy felt a little silly and that, perhaps, this was too far even for someone as romantic as Harry.  
All the doubt faded from his mind when he was met with the softest and most enigmatic smile he'd ever had the fortune of being so close to.

Harry pushed forward, one hand on Eggsy's hip and the other entwining their fingers and lifting both their hands as they swayed slowly to the music.

_“The lingering question kept me up. Two a.m., who do you love? I wonder 'til I'm wide awake. And now I'm pacing back and forth, wishing you were at my door...”_

He couldn't help but lean his head onto the taller man's shoulder, relaxing into him and overcome with all the emotions he'd run through that night.  
Luckily his partner seemed to know how to move the both of them in a soft and pleasant way that had Eggsy wondering for a moment if he was dreaming.

_“My thoughts will echo your name, until I see you again. These are the words I held back as I was leaving too soon.”_

Soon he was broken out of his thoughts by warm breath at his ear and as he moved to look up, his mouth was caught by Harry's.  
He was kissed once firmly and sharply and in pulling away he could see Harry's face was ever so slightly red, his eyes glassy and so deeply brown. He was lost for a moment in that space.

_“Please don't be in love with someone else, please don't have somebody waiting on you...”_

His hands moved on their own, one cupping his lover's face and the other around his back. It was slow, like before but the edge it had now made it all the more real and fresh in his mind that he was kissing Harry and Harry wanted him back.

_“I'll spend forever wondering if you knew, I was enchanted to meet you...”_

As the music died down they pulled away slowly, gauging each others faces for the chance that a second wave of doubt was setting in, now that the moment had passed. There was none.

They stood holding hands for a moment before both turning only to see the figure of Lancelot at the end of the street, dashing around the corner, a cab pulling up beside her and she was gone.

Chuckling to themselves they both turned to go back inside.

They exchanged plans for dinner, the possibility of watching another terrible eighties film and wondered how long Roxy would keep their rendezvous a secret. Eggsy bet a week and Harry, two days.  
Either way, they were both more than grateful for her interference and agreed to thank her properly tomorrow morning.

But for tonight and for many nights to come, all thoughts of anyone but themselves were entirely forgotten.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

  
In the back of the Kingsman cab, Roxy re-watched the video she had taken on her phone, complete with her added soundtrack, and smiled broadly as she posted it online.

Of course she made doubly sure to tag a certain songstress's profile in the description so she might see where the combined machinations of her music and Roxy's creative influence had succeeded.

And she laughed all the way home.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this ended up being 6 chapters instead of 4 because I wrote FAR TOO MUCH FOR A CRACK FIC ABOUT EGGSY LISTENING TO TAYLOR SWIFT. But it was a lot of fun and it's been a long long time since I actually finished a multichapter fic so thank you guys for all the lovely comments on this self indulgent little romp <3

**Author's Note:**

> I'm terrible for finishing fics so I'm only aiming for four chapters with this one and yes my first Kingsman fanfic is Hartwin AND it's crack so lol here we are. Also sorry T. Swift I love you. 
> 
> Hope you all enjoy the ride :D


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